Tuesday, January 5, 2016

Dear Jillianne: To Journal or Not to Journal

I've been struggling with the idea of a baby journal for some time now. A part of me wants to be able to return to the memories I've written down and hold on to the baby June once was even for just a moment. The other part of me wants to focus on the present. Instead of worrying about capturing every detail, I want to live and relish in the here and now.

My parents certainly didn't document everything. I don't know, or really care, all of my stats and percentages from early childhood. Sure, it might be fun to compare mine and my husband's number's with June's. But I don't fee that I've lost something by not being able to do that. I keep asking myself if June is even going to care about these details when she's my age. Am I even going to care? Or will I be so consumed with love for my grandchildren to want to read about the time June said "Dada" for the first time, or when tooth #7 finally broke through?

I keep thinking about what families did 100, even 200, years ago. Pictures weren't taken of every little thing. Milestones weren't written down. And I have a feeling they might've been happier for it.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against people who document their kids' lives. Whether that's through pictures, videos, or journaling. I'm not against remembering the past. I think there's a lot to be learned from our successes and failures. But for me, I think when just the idea of doing something causes so much struggle I must examine the motives. Am I journaling about my daughter's everyday life for either her or myself? Or am I just keeping up with the Jones's?

In a world where we think our every though is significant enough to post on the internet, maybe we need a little more face-to-face time and a little less face-to-screen time. So instead of constantly having "update June's journal" on my to-do list, I'm going to put "be present in your daughter's life."

God Bless,